Monday, March 26, 2007

Things I Think now that I'm starving....

1) Do skinny people simply NOT eat anything that tastes good? Ever?

2) Why don't they make Slurpees with Diet pop? Why God? Why?

3) Why won't Krista believe me when I tell her that Sex burns 1000 calories per minute? she responds by informing me she would only burn 500 calories.........I don't really understand what she means by that though.........

4) Why is it that when you drink less than a pound of water, I immediately gain 2 pounds?

5) After eating all that freeze-dried tasteless spacefood, do Astronauts binge when they get back on earth?

6) With all the wonderful drugs these days, the flu is actually sounding good....I'd get to lie in bed and sleep for few days, AND I'd probably drop 5-6 pounds at the same time......

7) Shoot me, or feed me, I don't care which, just do it quickly.

8) The only time it's safe for me to go grocery shopping is IMMEDIATELY after dinner.

9) Costco is a bad place to go, even if I resist all the sample tables laced strategically throughout, I CANNOT get past the pizza, hotdogs, and chicken calzones near the exit.......impossible.

10) I get great joy out the three chocolate chips that they put into the choclate chip-caramel rice cakes Krista has me eating......AND I get depressed once I get the third one and still have to eat half a rice cake....

11) Most disturbingly of all.......I am beginning to understand how cannibilism could become an option if I'm ever stranded on an island.

1 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

They DO make slurpees with diet pop - diet pepsi and crystal light to be exact. Enjoy!

April 11, 2007 at 5:28 PM  

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